"Listen, I won't tell your mom and I'm not gonna make a big deal out of this."
No, you're just gonna tell the entire internet.
And WTF does he keep talking about turning a $1800 PC into a brick? A website 'virus' won't 'brick' a computer. At worst, if you're dumb enough to be running Windows, you'll have to re-install it.
I bet the safe sites he suggested were all tubes.
.