01-03-2012, 05:12 PM
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Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: San Francisco Bay Area
Posts: 38,323
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Quote:
Lyndon Hermyleione LaRouche commonly referred to as fucktard is a crazy Jew who wants to rule the world. His policies have been commonly criticized for being buttfucking insane.
He has been running for president for the last 38 years, unfazed by the fact that all of his attempts so far have been a gigantic failure, first as a (National) Socialist Labor candidate, then on the Random Fucktard ticket, and finally as a Democrat, even though they've shown that they'd rather run a nigra named after a terrorist than have anything to do with him.
Compare this to the interwebs fueled super-success of Ron Paul. LaRouche also doesn't seem to care that his good ideas have already been used by someone else who didn't do so well after a few years.
His followers tend to be extremist IRL trolls, often engaging in cosplay for absurdist street theater demonstrations and verbally assaulting passersby, shouting nonsense at them about geometry and cold fusion. They do this because the alternative is to go home and listen to motivational speeches by LaRouche, in which he will explain that anyone who doesn't make him a pile of money is a cocksucking faggot with brain fungus and mommy issues, a traitor, and possibly also an Englishman.
His greatest accomplishment in life has been to make Alex Jones look reasonable and respectable. He also successfully predicted the nuclear wars in 1976, 1977, 1979, and 1984, and the Soviet conquest of the US in the 1980s. Many think he does this just to sell more of his books, although internal sales figures show that the best way to increase sales of LaRouche's books is to have someone who's not LaRouche write them.
Despite having been diagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic, LaRouche has established himself as the most successful long-term economic forecaster on the planet by predicting imminent global economic meltdown in every year except 1991 (when he predicted sunshine with scattered showers).
When the 2008 financial crisis inadvertantly proved one of his predictions correct, he hurried to add the claim that billions of people would die if he weren't given plenipotentiary economic powers immediately. He wasn't, they didn't.
Unlike most people, who blame the Jews for everything that goes wrong, LaRouche blames the British (but clarifies that the British are actually controlled by a degenerate subspecies of Jewish bankers).
His blaming the British for everything started when his wife fled from his tender embrace to go live with a Britfag, exclaiming, 'At least Cyril doesn't insist that lubrication is a Bilderberger plot.' He is also willing to give the Democrats in general a pass despite numerous hilarious things that have happened during the rule of Democratic presidents. It is important to note that while LaRouche trusts the governments completely, his first rule is never trust a businessman since they are all thieving cunts like him; this is the only thing about which he has ever been right.
According to Lyn, the British invented sex, drugs, and rock music as part of a Babylonian conspiracy to destroy America and promote Aristotelian empiricism. (They then went on to invent homosexuality, video games, masturbation, the Internet, and pretty much everything else that anyone on Earth finds fun.).
His explanation for why the ancient Babylonians were conspiring against a society that would not exist for several thousand years hinges upon the simple assumption that his enemies are vastly more intelligent than he is. (This is true.)
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