NikKay, I used to be a video game addict myself so perhaps I could shed some light on the issue you're facing.
This may not apply to your case, but I'll give you some details of mine. At the time, I was also with a gorgeous, sexual woman who I had built a relationship with over the course of some years. I had always been a video game lover, but it was denied to me when I was a kid. So, I had spent the early part of my adulthood "getting back" what I felt was lost, which was as much video game time as possible, even at the expense of my relationship. On top of that, I saw it as an escape from the harsh realities of life. I did not have a job (couldn't keep one) and life was difficult. I found solace and comfort in video games...moreso than what was provided by my woman. Simply put...the games did more to dull the harshness of life than my woman did.
Ironically, not long after we had split up for good, my obsession with video games pretty much disappeared. It led me to believe that the woman I was with was actually a part of what created that stress and need to escape...not the root cause, but certainly a contributor. Nowadays, I do occasionally find myself playing a game for a little too long (especially RPGs), and sometimes it irritates the woman I'm with now (and have two children with). But now it's easy to recognize that something is wrong with life...there's a deeper issue involved, and it's making me seek an escape.
So in reality, it's a large number of compounded factors, not just a single issue. Like so many problems in life, if you try approaching it from a single point of view, you will not only fail to make any progress, but could actually make the problem worse. What you've stated leads me to believe that he has unrelated issues that fuel his obsession, and one of these issues is likely "a mother issue". Men who did not develop a good relationship with their mother during their childhood (as I did not) do not find it easy to form close bonds with women beyond a sexual level. They may eventually learn how to do this (as I did), but it is not as easy for them as it is for a man who had a good, strong relationship with his mother. The fact that he is unaware of what's going on around him and needs you to tell him to do things is a telltale sign of this; unconsciously, he needs a "mother figure" to give him direction. But the reason you're not having any luck in this particular aspect is because it's not getting through to him in the way his brain requires.
There's plenty else that can be said of this situation you're going through right now but I can assure you that you're not the only one who's having problems...he's got problems too. The both of you need to recognize and work on your own respective problems before trying to help the other with theirs. And believe me when I say that being a beautiful, sexually-open, money-making successful mother-of-his-children doesn't really mean a thing when it comes down to understanding a person's innermost feelings and needs. The two of you are clearly not on the same page.
Now what I'm NOT saying is to "just let it be". There is clearly a problem at hand. What I am saying though is that this is a problem that is not going to be solved easily, and in all reality, a therapist is likely gonna make it worse, not better. If anything, he needs a new form of escape, and it sounds like you do too.