Originally Posted by Carmine Raguso

I would go to the store and pick it up. Make sure to wear loose fitting shorts without any undies on underneath. Then walk up in between the crowd and rub your satchel on womens asses until you get a raging hard on. Then nonchalantly poke women with it and giggle deep down inside. Once you get your phone, go out to your car and remove your shorts and fap into a frenzy while sniffing the crotch of your shorts where your cock was bumping into people.

That's what I would do.