Quote:
Originally Posted by eroticsexxx
<devil's advocacy>
Wow...
There are some truly puritanical views in this thread.
*looks up at url to make sure that this GFY and not one of the other mainstream boards I frequent*
Shouldn't a relationship or marriage be based on complete trust and openness? While everyone has their own views on swinging, sometimes the freedom to 'dip out' in a discretionary fashion can strengthen a relationship, not weaken it.
Most people in modern day society have not come to grips with what this human existence should truly be and tend to remain deeply possessive of others who they happen to be married to or sleeping with at the time. That is a basic human tendency.
On the other hand those who embrace the ability of their partner to be free sexually are indeed truly free and clearly show a higher level of comprehension and maturity regarding sexual behavior.
Adults with a healthy sexual libido and a strong sense of commitment should be able to express their fantasies to each other and, in a safe environment, be able to explore them.
Who is truly weaker? Someone who tightly sets (and guards) the sexual boundaries of their partner due to insecurity/jealously/misunderstanding/immaturity or someone who is secure enough to completely trust and allow their chosen partner to live their life free from judgments.
We are in the adult industry right? While everyone has the right to their own opinion, shouldn't we all aim to exemplify a higher understanding of sexual nature and tendencies?
Look at it this way, due to some of the opinions expressed thus far, many here could (in theory) be labeled hypocrites for promoting such a free sexual lifestyle. It's not as if every pornstar is single or unmarried...
</devil's advocacy>
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All the swinger couples I've known all say that it's still cheating if their partner goes behind their back and fucks someone. Every one of them still has certain rules.
And the really interesting thing is that every couple I've ever known that did the open marriage or swinger lifestyle are all broken up, every one of them. Several of them due to crossing of lines or breaking of rules, all of it boils down to trust issues. Sorry, the picture perfect ideal permissive picture you're attempting to paint has major flaws.
And just because someone promotes adult, that doesn't automatically mean they must adopt a lifestyle that reflects what they promote. I promote about two dozen fairly kinky fetishes that I myself have zero interest in trying much less becoming.
But maybe there is some hypocrisy there, I don't know. But in this one instance I don't really care. I can promote all manner of lewdness and loose morals but in my private life I'm a one-woman kind of guy who prefers a woman I can trust. If one guy isn't enough for her she's free to get lost and find a guy who doesn't mind other guys pounding his woman.
By the way those open marriage/swinger people I mentioned I've known seem just as insecure as anyone, in some cases moreso. Several struck me as incredibly selfish as well. No thanks.