So my buddy James, who suddenly appeared out of thin air, started rubbing his crotch like a fuckin' pervert. I notice and I'm like, "What the fuck are you doing? I'm trying to handle some business here and you're molesting yourself like a fuckin' weirdo! Show a little self-control, will ya?"
I'm double-stressed: I've got this deadbeat chick and my friend who I can only assume is now a chemically imbalanced pervert that can teleport. But suddenly, an idea clicked that would solve both problems!
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