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Served
Sometimes people can really piss me off.
My story: An hour ago I get a knock at the door. I was surprised since 1) no one knows where I live (everything is routed to a P.O. Box), and 2) I don't like people (except my girlfriend that gives incredible head). A guy stood there looking like a bad version of Erik Estrada with sunglasses and all flashing some cheap looking badge asking for my last name.
I tell him, " This is my fucking house. I ask the questions. What the fuck do you want?"
"Are you Mr. (deleted)?"
"What the fuck is this about?"
"I am a process server."
"So. For the third time... what is this about?"
"I am suppose to serve a Mr. (deleted) (deleted) for this attorney. It is about a car accident."
"I don't drive and I haven't owned a car in years. That's not my name. You have the wrong person."
"Well we have traced through the post office a change of address to a P.O. Box and you are the registered leasee of the box."
"So. That ain't my name. Get the fuck off my property."
"Well Sir, consider yourself served."
"You're serving the wrong person."
"Oh... that's okay. I hear that all the time."
"You ARE an idiot. I'll even show you my I.D., you fool."
"That's okay." He drops a stack of papers on my door step.
Some people are stupid. After I leave, I walk outside and without touching the papers I read the legal summons. I'm not on the fucking lawsuit. No mention of me. What the fuck? I do see the name of a relative of mine that lives across the state. That's not my problem. Again, some people are dumb.
My neighbor comes over a few minutes as neighbors do (the damn curious worryworts).
"Hmmmm... I think that is the same guy that was kicking your door a few months ago."
"My door?" I reply.
"Yeah... that guy was kicking and pounding your door shouting out names and stuff. I was worried that he would do the same thing here."
"Why didn't you tell me before?"
"I don't know."
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Make Levees, Not War
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