Originally Posted by Sands

I will promise to answer all sales queries with complete and utter jibberish in this position. Of course I'll be accused of being a bot as I respond with intriguing statements such as "hathat was my 1 joke of the night!! heeeeheeha..." and "i want to make you happy when you are sad!!", but really, it'll be me typing very, very quickly. That's the kind of dedication I bring with me.

Sure, I can communicate lucidly and with the goal of drumming up new business through rapport-building and salesmanship, but honestly, isn't that approach a bit dated? The real secret of roping in today's big buyers -- aggravate them until they're foaming a the mouth, rabidly pawing the keyboard, and stringing the most vile obscenities together at the top of their lungs. That's when you hit 'em with the pitch!