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As long as we're going out on limbs, might as well get really specific.
Colts over Carolina, 24-21 on a last second field goal.
Manning goes down with an injury late in the 2nd quarter, with the Colts leading 17-7, and is replaced by Sorgi. Sorgi struggles mightily until late in the 4th, when he completes a desperation 4th down pass to Clark at the Colt's 38 yard line. Backed up in the dime defense, the Panthers defense allows Clark to scamper to midfield before bringing him down.
With just enough time for a single play before using their final timeout to set up a field goal, Sorgi hits Wayne over the middle at the Carolina 29.
Vinatieri then takes the field, kicks the game winning field goal, and the Panthers collectively collapse into a shuddering heap of tears on their sideline.
The next day, it is revealed that Vinatieri tested positive for a banned, performance-enhancing drug, and the NFL finds itself mired in a steroid scandal.
Hillary Clinton, still bitter over being passed over for the Democratic nomination, calls for an immediate investigation, and demands that President McCain appoint an independent prosecutor to head up the inquiry. In the meantime, Clinton says, the awarding of the Vince Lombardi trophy should be suspended, and no parades should be given for the Colts.
An outraged Indianapolis fan named Daniel McLopez Mohammed-Nyugen III travels to Washington D.C., clutching a newly purchased .38 in his lap, rocking back and forth slowly as he hums the Battle Hymn of the Republic. Arriving at Capitol Hill, he takes careful aim and squeezes the trigger -- only to discover that he has accidentally killed a male hot dog vendor that he merely mistook for Clinton.
The following day, Harry Reid proposes new legislation requiring (1) a longer waiting period on handgun purchases, and (2) a ban on hot dog vendors wearing pantsuits.
Or maybe it will be 27-24.... that part I'm not so sure about.
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Q. Boyer
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