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Listen you bitches, how dare you converse,
That bulge in my pants, well you're just making it worse!
Licking and panting and huffing and puffing,
And fucking and sucking and playful hand cuffing.
While you two are pushed against the Diplomat glass,
With 69 posiitions and tongues in your ass.
I'll be here in front of my screen,
Converting tranny videos that are gross and obscene.
To be a fly on the wall and witness those acts,
On that Heavenly Bed with those sweating arched backs.
With white sand beaches as far as you can see,
While I'm jerking off to NATS, HTML, and motherfuckin' FTP.
How dare you fucking tease me with this erotic rhyme,
I hope you both catch clamidia, herpes and chicken pox...all at the same time.
While I'm eating Jack in the Box tacos that cost 99 cents each,
You'll be dining on spicy shrimp cocktails from Nikki Beach.
"Should we fuck again or take another hit?"
(while I'm updating my mood on MySpace and shit).
I know I'm pathetic, don't remind me motherfuckers,
You with your lesbian sex, me with my TIVO'd Ice Road Truckers.
Penny and Trish, you can both suck an egg,
The only action I'll get is my dog humping my leg.
And since I won't be there to get in the mix,
You hot ass bitches better post pix!
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