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Kenny's puppy just emailed me, this is what he said....
"Fuck, I've had it with this stupid human owner. What the hell does he want from me? I thought his job was to teach me what he wants, but instead he just yells at me and hits me all the time. I can't do anything right it seems. I try to have fun and play, and he hits me. I need to stop and have a poop sometimes, and he hits me. I pass some water here.... he hits me. So I pass some water there... guess what? Yap, he hits me. Then he puts me out in the cold, where it is hard to poop and pass water, but if I do it there he brings me back inside and still doesn't look too happy.
It's no fun here. It was more fun when I was with my brothers and sisters, but this big bully has dognapped me. I think he's going to start withholding my food and water soon, and I think he might be a mental case. Will someone here please rescue me and shoot him for me?"
Signed ~ Loveable yet miserable.
Kenny, you been a baaaad master. BAD master. Post your address, so I can have someone sent over to slap you in the head a few hundred times.
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