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Old 01-03-2003, 01:06 AM  
LadyMischief
Orgasms N Such!
 
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Oakville, Ontario
Posts: 18,135
If you recieve an e-mail entitled "Badtimes", delete it immediately. Do not open it.
This one's pretty nasty. It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but will
delete everything within six metres of your computer. It demagnetizes the strips on your
credit cards, it reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the tracking on your VCR,
and uses sub-space field harmonics to scratch any CD's you might attempt to play.

It will program your telephone's auto-dial to call on your mother-in-law. It will make
your dog roll in smelly things. It will drink all your beer. It will leave dirty socks
on the coffee table when you are expecting company. It will cause you to run with scissors,
and give you Dutch Elm Disease.

It will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in next to a full bathtub.
It will remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, and refill your skim milk
with whole.

It is insidious and subtle. It is also a rather interesting shade of mauve.
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