Fabien

My kid has as sever problem with his leg (i'm separated).
He has a huge thing (sorry my english sucks)
about 3 inches from his femur, with 9 long nails screwed to his bone (ugly to see).
Stuck to his bed almost all of the time.
And hole lot of months like this in front of us.
If he needs to go to the toilet, i have to help him out.
(now imagine when it's time to do the BIG JOB)
When he has to shower, it hurts, it takes time and I HURT TO SEE HIM HURT.


It's been 2 months since the operation.
I'm seeing a huge drop in my income !
Lots of expenses.
As i have to go the hospital every damn week and sometimes,
we have to stay for a couple of days.
It's a 2 hour drive (so 4 hours back and forth) as we need specialists
and they don't want to deal with it here.
All the meals, the parking, the 10$/day Mcdonalds room deal (thank god !)
The 500$/month machine that works out his leg for a few hours (rented)
All the specialists we have to pay that are not covered to make sure everything works out right !


I have no f*cking time to work !
It's insane !
Dad, i need to pee, dad i need to take a sh*t
Dad i'm thirsty, dad it hurts.
Now we're having some people over to come along.
Nurses, teachers, therapists name it, name it. About 60% is paid out by our gouvernement
(again thank god)


I'm so tired now guys, so tired.
F*ck getting more traffic to my stuff.
I know i should work right now while i have time but.......
I feel like talking (as you may have noticed).

You know what's killing me ?
He says once in a while, "Why me" "Why do i have to deal with this"
Now WTF can i tell him ?
The only brillant thing i thought about is, "It could have been worst"
Yeah right, what a f*cking damn a$$ reply huh ?
But tell me ? What would you say ?

The deal we have (with my ex) is that i have him during the weeks and she has him during the
weekends so she can f*cking work.
I know i'm being a$$ raped but what can i say ? My son is my priority !
I have my boy like 70% of time (always have been like this)
Now why i ain't asking to get full time custody (whatever it's called)
I'M A F*CKING PORN MASTER now you go to a judge and tell himwhat you do for a living
and she knows this i'm like 100 percent sure !
I love him, it's my flesh and bone. I would die for him.
Now WTF should i do ?
When it's "her week" (which never turns out into a full week)
And no she ain't a stripper, hell she's a specialist ahhh never mind
that's another story.

Now i'm scared to loose what i have.
House,car etc...
I have to find a way.


Thanks for reading all my bull.....
You're like my therapist.

He is with his mother for the next 2 days and i'm drunk right now.
Hope you make lots of sales, no shit.............

Like Pantera once said:
"Fuck the world for all it's worth, fuck myself don't leave me out"

I'm a the only one ? Probably not tho i doubt it.