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Before I moved to Porn Valley, my hairdresser was named Spanky. I loved Spanky, especially the night I brought a really young straight guy to the gay bar and Spanky walked right up and stuck his hand in the guy's pants and fondled his balls. That made me love Spanky more than I already did, and I already did love him a lot. I miss him. Especially since that old Korean bitch at the mall fucked-up my hair. I'll bet she never grabs anyone's balls for fun, unless it's to ruin their ball hair.
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