DEAR ABBY: My daughter, "Rhonda," hosts several "soft porn" Web sites, and it upsets me greatly. She's 24 and a very bright, sweet and loving person, which is why it's so difficult for me to understand why she does this.
Rhonda earned more than $100,000 last year and has a sizable savings account, but her small business is pornography! We don't discuss her occupation, and no one but myself and my ex-husband know she's involved in this kind of thing. As far as everyone else is concerned, she "designs Web sites."
Rhonda wants me to be proud of her accomplishments, but I'm not. I love my daughter very much and keep hoping she'll grow out of this; however, I'm not sure she will. I hate lying to everyone about what she does, but I would never want anyone to know.
How do I come to terms with this -- or can I? -- HER LOVING MOTHER
DEAR LOVING MOTHER: You and your daughter have very different moral values. While it's against your principles, what she's doing is legal. She's built a successful business and wants you to respect what she has accomplished.
That said, I doubt you will ever see eye-to-eye on this issue. Love her as your daughter, try to accept that this is a choice she has made, and focus on her positive qualities: She's bright, sweet and loving -- not to mention a whiz at business. At this point, I doubt you can change her.
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