|
I guess all of you fucks have been out of the loop. The requirements for being a real American have changed over the past thirty years. The new requirements are as follows:
-Weigh at least 250 pounds, 300 pounds preferred
-Knowing that money is more important than family
-Your diet consists of eating nothing but twinkies
-Voted for a chimpanzee for president. Twice
-Your exercise consists of lifting the remote control
-You must watch Fox News religiously
-Wearing I HATE SOCCER t-shirts
-Own at least three handguns, two high powered rifles
-Watch horrible movie remakes such as Bewitched
If you do not meet at least half of these requirements consider yourself a dirty Canadian.
|