HOw was Everyones Fourth!
Mine was quite entertaining. To not e the highlights, I'm posting this for YOUR entertainment.
The beginning...
So I take my girlfriend and our friend up to my mothers.... (thats her)
So we barbeque some johnsonville Brats, some chicken and some steak. I blew some shit up with modified fireworks..sent a folgers tin can over 150 feet high with one firework.
The Plan...
So the newspaper for where she lives reads. "live music, street fair and great view of the show". GREAT! so we pack into the truck (she lives 23 miles away from town) and head down there.
What really happened...
We get there. True there is live music. Some unknwon classic rock cover band. as far as street fair goes, there was a taco wagon that is usually like 3 or 4 blocks down the road everyday and some guy selling clocks. Great view of some trees by the lake. So as assumed for the 3 previous hours of sitting there that they would shoot them in the wrong spot .....and they did, the whole show was behind some trees ... 1000+ people gathered in this park, and they shoot them off behind the trees....so at 10 pm half dark, half of this crowd scrambles to see what little they could from an hole in a tree and the other half left pissed.
The Entertainment...
Leaving this thing was the best part. We parked in this enclosed fence area they let open for parking. So we were back to the truck by the time it was over anyway. we piule in while everyone is still walking, and some others that scrambled pulling out as well. So heres where it gets interesting. Im in the back with the girls, my mother and step father are in the front, hes driving. he cinches up behind this truck thats going out, while two cars are trying to cut in at every chance from each side, Dennis (step father) dosnt give them a chance at all, stays inches from behind this truck. Our plan is to go get ice cream and what not so Im screaming "waffle ConeS!!! We must ALLLL have waffle cones!!" to the people in the truck and everyone around (Im weird) so some guys yells out his window, ASSHOLE THIS AND ASSHOLE THAT at dennis for not letting him in. So i lean out the window and look at the guy and scream like 7 feet from him. "Were trying to get some fuckin waffle cones dickhead" . i think that pissed him off ... but since it made no sense he shrugged it. So i continue to yell at everyone around, Mind you were in gridlock trying to get down the road into the main part of town. So I yell at some college guys in a van. One of them turns and sticks his tongue out or something at my mom. She flashes him the peace sign right and stuck her tongue out too. He then moons her. so we are all busting up laughing. us all in the truck and everyone around. So i get the bright idea, "Here mom, heres a dollar, tellem to shake it" So my mom, 52. is hanging out the window waving this dollar at this van, they are all like whoa who is this lady....
so we drive away a little and then she jumps out and runs down to the van and as the guy is mooning her again, she sticks the dollar in his ass....